an apology (ish)

just wanted to say sorry/explain myself for when i act like a crazy person...but i am a crazy person - always have been, its just been more accentuated that last few years as i poorly sift through lifes changes...seeing my son suffer is a huge part of it, the uncertainty of his future, the let down of people being ignorant and cold hearted about his needs, even people who claim to have a life marked by Love...if you have a heart, these pictures make you feel something, take that feeling, add to it that it never turns off as a parent, what you see in the pics is only part of his troubles, other kids and their stupid parents act like hes contagious, friends and family can't hack it and bow out, etc

i'm not sure what else to write, maybe i'll add more as my brain clears